If you indicate to your guests that you are on an extremely tight budget, but you and your groom leave in a horse and carriage or a Hummer limo, guests are going to be a little “tee’d off” that you had a cash bar - making them pay for their drinks.
You have invited your family and dearest and closest friends. Wouldn’t you want them to remember your wedding with good thoughts rather than complaining thoughts? Think of it this way. You are hosting a party in your home. Would you have guests pay for their drinks? Most likely not, especially if you want to keep these friends. Well, your reception is like one huge party of invited guests. They should never, ever have to pay to attend your reception. If you need to save money, cut your guest list, have smaller centerpieces, etc. If you’re thinking, “I can’t cut anyone from the guest list.” Then ask yourself, “Would I invite this person/couple over for dinner?” If not, they are probably just an acquaintance, so no need to invite them. Why spend money for someone you probably will not be in another social situation with again?
Guests may not remember too much of your ceremony, but they usually do remember the reception, especially the food and whether they had to pay for their drinks or not. I remember helping one of my brides with her wedding and the one priority for her guests was that her reception had excellent food. She knew that’s what guests were going to remember, and it is so true. When planning my daughter’s wedding eight years ago, we found a perfect venue that apparently had excellent food because we still get comments from family and friends that said it was the best “wedding” food they have ever tasted. Just something for you to think about.
Another thing guests don’t like are favors that they can’t use and they just throw away. The best favors are either edible, i.e. chocolates or something you know they can use, such as candles.
Most guests also get bored with slideshows. They already know you, so why have them endure seeing all your baby photos, childhood experiences, and you and groom posed at various locations? Save this to show at the rehearsal dinner or have a portable DVD player by the guest book that guests can view at their leisure without having to be “forced” to sit quietly and watch a video in the middle of your reception. Plus, nine times out of ten, something goes wrong with the video or PowerPoint presentation. That takes away from the flow of the reception if the tech guys have to play around with the equipment to get it running again.
To sum up, as host and hostess of your wedding, it is your responsibility to ensure your guests have a great time. Make it unique, experience good times and have fun. In other words, nothing else should take precedence over the comfort of your guests. You may want to have the most gorgeous silk linens and Chivari chairs, but if you didn’t spend the extra money to provide drinks for your guests, they won’t even notice the linens and chairs. Therefore, please don’t compromise the comfort of your guests.
Okay, I’m stepping down from my soapbox now.
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